Dear Travis: What Is Yours (a marriage letter)


God must have laughed, His fingers pressed to His smiling lips as He looked on at the trials and joys we’d face together.

Because you’re so you, and I’m so me.

He saw the way we’d lay in bed at night, cheeks to pillows, eyes darkened by the lately-fallen dusk, overlooking our day.

And He knew it then, what the tired eyes and whispering hearts would one day want, more than anything: the peace and the quiet.

He knew us, and He knew you.

And He sees it now, all the things you have.


What is yours is the enduring patience for me, with me, through the battling moments of parenthood and the risky seasons of faith.

What is yours is the adventure-spirit that gives me permission to smell every flower and dream every dream.

What is yours is the critic’s eye, that stops me when my rosy lenses are fogging the truth, but that steps back when I need to keep my own vision.

What is yours is the very essence of a fathering heart, the graceful and loving and unafraid parts.

What is yours is a constant view, that asks me to see all of it with you- to look back at who and where we were, to find ourselves now, and to embrace future days with confidence, all of us, all of our life, all of our hope.

What is yours is this whole-hearted ability to see me, to ask how I’m doing and mean it and make me answer in the honesty that I don’t always want to give you.


What was yours then–

the days of the black jeep and the 2-year dreads;

the days of constant patchouli and finding that the God of the Ugandan bush was also the God of the small-town church–

What you had then brings you to what you have now, and what you have brought to me: the extreme contentment and joy of being your wife, friend, lover and fellow-dreamer.

And years from now, you’ll have more– an abundance of seasons passed and blessings poured out and lessons learned and dreams come and gone.

What is yours now will lead to what you will have in two, three, fifty years.

An enduring heart.

A way with words.

A teaching spirit.

A sight of God that is unlike any other.

What is yours is every amount of life and gift, every good thing given in grace.


And I have you.

I love you.


To read more Marriage Letters and learn about its beginnings, visit my friend Seth and Amber’s blogs.

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